Intro
We, the people, of the un-united planet Earth, hold these truths to be self-evident. That though all men may be created equal, and all women may be created spectacular, all science has been created divided. That is to say, all science that has thus far and henceforth will be discovered has been and can be divided into two major categories. The “Lesser Scientific Community” (LSC) is the conglomerate of everything that has been acknowledged from Astrophysics to Zoology and is what is found percolating in University classrooms and corporate science labs across the surface of this rock. The “Higher Scientific Community” (HSC) however, instead of concerning itself with mere trivialities such as “Who are we?” or “Why are we here?” is conquering much more diverse and important topics like “What caused the invasion of the ‘Largely Grumpy Sea-Bass of the 23 ½ dimension?”, “Why are there so many types of Time Travel” and “Where did I put my coffee?”.
The HSC is centered somewhere in the Caribbean Sea on a remote mound of sand and slightly volcanic rock called Ventosus Island. It is renowned as being the only land mass (though mass could be too strong of a word) to have never been struck by an Hurricane. At least not since the last remaining LSC installation, the Hall of Meteorological Records mysteriously blew away again. Ventosus Island is the home of many renowned research facilities such as the tandem labs of the conjoined Crutchuizen twins, the researcher Dr. Slobodan Vilczevski, and the HSC’s empirical leader/part time publicity writer Spinner McBlam the 42nd.
This scientific journal is the chronicle of discovery from the Island of Ventosus. Press on, dear reader for though these writings will be sometimes narration, often expository, often contradicting, and generally confusing, I hope they will be profoundly useful in explaining what is really going on with those lost socks.
Sincerely,
Spinner McBlam XLII
Empirical Leader and part-time publicity writer for the Higher Scientific Community